‘Ding dong, the witch is dead’

A scathing obituary about a malignant Maine mother went viral Saturday, for both its brutal honesty and savage delivery.

Florence “Flo” Harrelson, 65, died back in February, but her obituary wasn’t published by the Kennebec Journal and Morning Sentinel until Thursday.

That’s because Harrelson’s daughter, Christina Novak, who wrote the abrasive obituary, said she only learned her mom was dead this month.

Florence Harrelson died in February, but her family only learned of her death in August — because according to her daughter, “she wanted those she terrorized to still be living in fear.” Christina Novak/Facebook
Novak kept the obit short and pointed, saying her mother left “a wake of destruction” in her path.” Christina Novak/Kennebec Journal & Morning Sentinel

Novak noted in the obit that her mother, a former U.S. Marine who served as a Maine prison guard, died “on Feb. 22, 2024, without family by her side due to burnt bridges and a wake of destruction left in her path.”

Harrelson had cancer, but died from heart failure, her daughter said.

Novak said she last spoke to her mother 10 years ago.

“Florence did not want an obituary or anyone including family to know she died,” reads the obituary.

“That’s because even in death, she wanted those she terrorized to still be living in fear looking over their shoulders. So, this isn’t so much an obituary but more of a public service announcement.”

She also shared the obit to Facebook, and punctuated it with a line from “The Wizard of Oz”: “Ding dong, the witch is dead.”

Christina Novak wrote the scathing obituary more as a public service announcement, she said. Christina Novak/Facebook

Novak told the Bangor Daily News she was “giggling to myself” while composing the obit.

She said she set out to write a traditional obituary, but kept drifting into sarcasm.

Novak even considered listing the ways in which her mother wronged her relatives.

Novak told the site she paid just over $86 for the picture-less obituary.

The ensuing entertainment, though, she said, was “priceless.”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *