(spoilers for the first two episodes of Dune: Prophecy)
About a year ago, social media went wild when the Madame Web trailer was released and gifted us with a line of dialogue so clunky, so needlessly expository, that it immediately became the subject of memes galore, despite not making it into the final cut of the film:
“He was with my mom in the Amazon when she was researching spiders right before she died.”
Now Dune: Prophecy, HBO’s latest mega IP grab, is far more competently done. Without a doubt, Madame Web is uniquely terrible for a multitude of reasons, and Prophecy easily steps over that incredibly low bar. But as I sat through the second episode, attempting to stave off the boredom that nipped at my heels in nearly every scene, there was one particular bit of dialogue that had all the grace of Frankenstein’s monster attempting a pirouette. It was at this exact moment I realized that despite its surface-level polish and film/literary legacy, when it comes to writing, this show’s only one step above arguably the worst superhero movie ever created:
“I pledged my sword and my name to the rebellion because The Great Houses are hoarding spice, forcing the people to turn to violence to get what they need to survive.”
Some may argue that adapting an entry in what is widely considered the most dense sci-fi franchise in history—the novel this show is based on, Sisterhood of Dune, was written by Kevin J. Anderson and Brian Herbert, son of Frank Herbert, who wrote the original Dune series—requires a fair amount of hand-holding in order to successfully convey the lore behind the mysterious Bene Gesserit sisterhood and their machinations behind the scenes as royal families vie for control over the planet Arrakis, the sole source of melange, or “spice,” the most valuable asset in the universe. Except it really doesn’t.
Sure, the powers of the Bene Gesserit and the socio-political happenings of The Great Houses, with a soupçon of lower class rebellion, require some establishing, just like any other work of fiction. But it’s tiresome to the extreme to have the most rudimentary aspects of the story served like a row of Cheerios laid out for a toddler’s snack: “The Emperor’s Truthsayer killed just before the royal wedding. That’s no coincidence. That’s an assassination.” Yes, thank you for putting into words what we just saw on screen, neither I nor the character this asinine declaration is aimed at could have understood otherwise.
The fact that this is a feature, not a bug—almost every other line spoken is some expository gruel, and even when it isn’t it’s still devoid of any storytelling nutrition—makes Dune: Prophecy a mind-numbing chore to watch. Not even the presence of some acting heavy hitters are enough to make this show interesting; no matter how much Emily Watson (as Reverend Mother Valya Harkonnen) scowls, there’s no way to inject any import into the Sisterhood’s mission, due mostly to how little the show cares about the inner workings of the order itself. Mark Strong, typically a welcome presence who’s set on autopilot here, stars as Emperor Javicco Corrino, whose attempt to maintain his hold on Arrakis makes him vulnerable to the siren call of power in the form of mysterious soldier Desmond Hart (Travis Fimmel) who possesses terrifying powers. Aside from a few familiar faces doing their level best, the ensemble is mostly an array of sleepy performances struggling to put any meaning into this script.
Even as someone who found the Denis Villeneuve Dune films to be fairly watchable (though I found the first one superior to the second) I find the idea of sticking through this show exhausting despite its brief six-episode season length. Dedicated fans of science fiction might be able to see this series through to the end, but I have a hard time imagining anyone having enthusiasm for a show that’s so unwilling to put any trust in its audience, no matter how much it, like the Bene Gesserit matriarch at the center of it, insists on its own unearned brilliance.
Dune: Prophecy airs on HBO and streams on Max every Sunday.
Kaleena Rivera is the TV Editor for Pajiba. She can be found on Bluesky here.